Friday, January 20, 2012

And the big news is.....


we're adopting! For most of you, it won't come as a surprise since we have been telling just about everyone when the opportunity arises. We are still very early in the process. Most of the paperwork is ready for the home study and we are starting our dossier paperchase. There is a lot involved.

Why are we doing this? Umm, cause we're crazy. Or maybe we aren't able to add children to our family fast enough through biological means. Or maybe, just maybe, God has called us to it. The first two being reasons that some have suggested for why we are adopting at this phase in our family life. The third being the real reason.

B.J. and I have always known we were going to adopt 'eventually'. We figured that God would have that happen later - after our kids were, at the very least, older. Nope. For the last 18 months, we have gotten to have a front row seat to adoption - through Janaya's vision teacher, Maryanne, and also through my friend from my TMI years, who just completed an adoption of a little girl from India. We have also gotten to follow the blog of another friend who is nearing the end of her family's adoption journey. Okay, no big deal. How cool that others are adopting.

Then, one day, Maryanne mentioned someone she knew who knew someone else from India who was wanting to give her baby girl up for adoption, "Wow, that would be so cool," was my thought. I just knew that B.J. would never go for it though. It would be crazy, to say the least. I wish I could say that I prayed that B.J. would be on board, but that would be untrue. I honestly didn't even have enough faith to think that my prayers would make a difference. So, I made sure, when I mentioned it to B.J. that night, to mention it in an 0ff-handed kind of way. That way, he wouldn't think I was seriously considering it. His response? "Hmm, maybe we are supposed to pursue adoption sooner rather than later. We need to pray about this." Say WHAT??????????????? Did I really just hear right?

So, we prayed. Well, B.J. prayed while I prayed and researched like CRAZY!!!!!! (and found out that the India thing wouldn't work) I had this growing sense of urgency about the whole thing. The more I read and learned the more convinced I became that this was what we were to do. B.J. took a while longer (actually, I think he was just trying to be sure of God's calling), but he came to the same conclusion (nice when God convinces our spouse rather than us trying to do that work). There was one hold-up. A lot, okay most adoption agencies do not like if you get pregnant while in the adoption process. Since most adoptions take at least a year, the chance of us getting pregnant during the adoption process is pretty high. We're not the biggest fans of birth control for lots of reasons, but that is a whole other post. So, I started contacting agencies that worked in our countries of interest to find out how they would handle a pregnancy. That eliminated lots of them. Eventually, we decided to go with CCAI and submitted our application right around Christmas-time.

So, now we are in the paper-chase. We are getting child-abuse and criminal background clearances. We are ordering multiple copies of birth certificates. We are getting ready to order passports. We are writing a 20-30 page 'autobiography' which consists of answering a LOT of questions. And, we are looking into fundraising opportunities. We don't have 20k-30k sitting in our bank account just waiting to be spent. Most people don't. What we do have is a God that has clearly called us to this special-needs adoption from China and is more than able to provide all we need. I am frequently reminding myself of that when I think about the payments coming due. This is a faith walk. A chance to do what God has commanded the church to do - to care for orphans and widows. An opportunity to welcome a child into our lives and teach him/her about Christ and His love. How can we do any less? We, as the church, are all called to care for orphans. Some of us are called to adopt. Others are called to support those who adopt. Still others are called to go care for orphans, while others are called to advocate on behalf of orphans. Whatever that calling may look like, God's word is very clear that we are to care for orphans.

So, I would covet your prayers in this time. We are stepping out in faith because God has called us to do that. It is His job to make it happen.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

James 1:20

"For the anger of man (or mom) works not the righteousness of God." Ouch. I needed to read that verse today. This is one of those days that I have felt disconnected from my children and overwhelmed with the tasks set before me. I have struggled to keep my focus on God and instead have been scurrying about trying to do everything I am supposed to do. I have doubted God's provision, stressed about the state of my house, and worst of all, been frustrated and angry with my kids. There are times that I wish that my natural response to frustrations would be one that would work what God wants, but I know it doesn't. My natural response is to get an edge on my voice, speak louder, be more abrupt, and be annoyed and irritated with my kids. A screaming one year old only adds fuel to the fire, so to speak.

Rewritten for me, that verse says "Rachel, your anger won't do the work that needs to happen in your kids (in fact it probably interferes with it - my own addition)." All right. I am choosing to turn this day around. I am going to memorize this verse and allow the Holy Spirit to remind me of it as needed. I will focus on the many, many blessings God has given us. I will trust that He will provide for all of our needs, and I will quit trying to make everything happen. Instead of doing it on my own, I choose to REST in His arms. And as I am resting, I am going to go deal with a two year old who doesn't want to nap ;)

Monday, January 9, 2012

Adoption assistance

No time for a full blog entry now, but if you get a chance, please click the link below and sign the petition asking Congress to make the Adoption Tax Credit fully refundable for 2012 and 2013 instead of phasing it out. I promise a new post soon :)

http://www.change.org/petitions/make-adoption-costs-fully-refundable-in-the-2012-2013-tax-years#